They learned...

Hey people, hope y'all had a great weekend? Mine was great just 'cos of a discussion I had with my younger sisters.

You see I started modeling at 17, immediately I left secondary school, so I got kind of exposed at a very early age. One of the things that I got exposed to was propositions from men. You know men who will offer you this and that just to sleep with you or keep you as a mistress. Even at 17 I knew that was not the life for me, so I never lived it. Not even in the worst of times. I used to believe that once you sleep with a man for money, you've lost your dignity as a woman...now I am a bit more flexible. I don't condone it but I understand it. And I don't judge girls who live that kind of lifestyle like I used to judge them. Now I believe in live and let live.

So this weekend, I heard my younger sis, Laura, talking heatedly with someone on the phone. What caught my attention was when she said 'If you like make it a billion Naira, you're wasting your time. I've told you to stop calling me". So curiously I asked her what was going on, she wasn't going to tell me at first but I persisted 'til she told me the whole story.

If you remember some weeks back I introduced my younger sister to you all. I told you guys she'd just started her own dance school/group and is also a fitness instructor. (She has a diploma in Human Kinetics and Health Education). So a few days after I put her pix and details on my blog, one male reader of this blog called her.

You see my sis does home service ONLY for women who can’t or won’t come to the gym to train...and she charges 50grand to go to their homes three times a week for three months, plus you pay another 4grand to register with her. She works real hard for her money!!!

So this guy wanted to know Laura's fitness payment structure which she told him but explained that she doesn't render home services to men (I'm sure y'all know that's dangerous). Then the guy offered to give her 54grand to spend one night with her. He said something like...you don't have to suffer for three months, I'll pay you all that money for just one night. Laura politely declined. A few days later he doubled the offer to 104grand...Laura still said thanks but no thanks...and he kept bugging her until this past weekend when he tripled the money to 154grand...she was telling him off when I heard the conversation.

When she told me about this guy and how much he'd been bugging her I felt responsible 'cos I was the one who put her out there...her picture, her number, you know. I also felt like she should have come to me with what was going on, when I asked her why she didn't, my younger sister looked at me and said "Because I can handle it. I've seen the way you've handled these men over the years...let's just say I learned from the best."

I can't begin to explain to you all how that made me feel; hearing that from my younger sister. I don't think I've had a prouder moment in a long time. I mean, it's one thing to live a lifestyle, it's another thing for people to emulate you. Especially people who mean a lot to you.

My sisters and I gathered and shared our experiences, how we shouted at the men, made fun of them and their offers, how we basically dealt with their propositions. In everything my younger ones said, one thing was unanimous...they all learned from their big sister, who started at 17, to turn down offers upon offers.

I see the way these girls are negotiated and treated by men, and I can only be grateful that my sisters aren’t in that market. No one of you out there would want any girl you know or care about to live that life ‘cos it’s the most degrading thing ever. You should see what these girls are subjected to. I’ve seen and heard a lot that I can’t disclose here; my only happiness is that I set an example many years ago that my younger sisters felt was worthy of emulation.

Having said that, here's a piece of advice to all 'those' young girls out there

I'm not a saint, my sisters aren't, nobody is...God knows we all have our shortcomings, but when it comes to the issue of our bodies, we should know where to draw the line. Being broke is not a crime; neither is living within our means. We should learn to carry ourselves with pride and always remember that money and all the fine things of life isn't everything. When we leave this world, none of us will leave with the things we've acquired. The only thing that remains after we are gone is our legacy...what do you want yours to be? Think seriously about that when next a man puts a price on God's temple...your body.

You see, if you work hard, you can even be as rich as these men + you walk around with your head held up high, knowing you never sold yourself cheap. Believe me, you don't need their money, you can make yours if you discover your talent, full potential and work very hard.

There's dignity in labour...even for a woman
~Linda

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Cheers
xx